The past couple of weeks have been kind of good. Not to say there haven't been low points, but I feel like I am coming out of a fog, of sorts, and it feels good.

Kent and I went North to the Copper Country for the holiday weekend. Actually, we only went for a night, but it was still nice to get away. We did some work for Ma & Pa Randell on the farm and then spent a lot of time wandering around the area exploring old remnants and ruins of the mining industry. We played Scrabble. I won. Woot Woot!!

I've started a Gratitude Journal at the suggestion of my therapist. I've thought about doing one before, but just never had the motivation, but she suggested that doing it would really help to improve how I tend to look at things. Somewhere along the line I've become quite the pessimistic person, always assuming the worst about things instead of exploring more positive possibilities. I have to admit, it's kind of working. The more I think about the things I have to be grateful for, the better I realize I have it and how things really aren't as bad as I sometimes feel they are. It's really helped with my interactions with Kent too. I am really seeing him in the way I should be seeing him, and not as someone who wants to just bring me down. That's a problem that stems from just really feeling like I am not deserving of someone like him or the kind of life we could have together, which is really stupid when you think about it. But one of the things we talked about in my last session was how hard I am on myself. So, I am working on that.

A bit o' good news. About a month ago I applied for a Unit Clerk position at Marquette General Hospital and got called in for an interview for the Ortho/Neuro floor. I didn't get that job, but it inspired me to harass the other departments to make sure they were pulling my application. One of the departments I called was the Hemodialysis department. I spoke with the supervisor there and she said she would call HR to have them pull my application and schedule an interview. A week went by and I didn't hear anything from MGH, so I called back and Andrea, the floor supervisor, went ahead and set up an interview with me herself. I went in last Friday for the interview, which I felt went very well, but was nervous about getting too excited about it because I didn't want to jinx it. I gave them until Thursday and when I didn't hear back, I called Andrea again and left a message saying I was very interested in the position if it was still open. Well, HR called me on Friday to offer me the job!!! WOoot Woot!

Getting a job at the hospital is a good thing up in these parts. I mean, Kent even has people at his job congratulating HIM on my "getting in at the hospital", so, whew! It's job security, fairly decent pay and good benefits. I only start off at part time, but I don't really mind because it's the foot in the door I need. Andrea already asked me about how much I'd be willing to work, and I told her I'd prefer full time which she was happy to hear about. I guess there will be a full time position opening up sometime this summer that I'd be first in line for, so that RAWKS. I have to admit, getting this job takes a big load off my shoulders, as far as my financial struggles go. It doesn't mean it solves them, but it certainly helps, so Thank You to whatever higher power out there had a hand in my landing this job. I am forever grateful.

Yesterday I went on a hike up Hogsback Mt. with Kent and the boys. It would have been a lot more fun is Joey wasn't being such a stick-in-the-mud. He pulled his typical "I'm pissed so I'm not going to talk or even acknowledge anything you have to say" schtick. I was pretty hurt at first. I just wanted to have a nice hike with my family, but instead I got the cold shoulder. I was wallowing a bit on our way back down and mentioned to Kent how I remember how we used to have to spend a good half hour looking for the perfect walking stick before we hit the trail when the kids were younger. Kent pointed out that maybe this kind of activity was just something Joey didn't enjoy doing anymore, which is probably true. Him saying that helped me put things into better perspective and made me feel better about it. I still think he would have enjoyed it had he gave it a real chance, but he didn't want to and if he wants to be a boob like that, I just have to learn to let him and let it roll off my back instead of taking it so personally. Josh, Kent and I had fun so that was good. It was quite the work out, though. I almost made it to the top without stopping for a break. Coming back down seemed more of a challenge than going up since I could feel gravity pulling me down with every step I took. It felt really great, though, and I'm glad we did it. I suggested we make the hike every Sunday, or do something related.

Came home from the hike last night and started dinner and worked on laundry. The washer was broke all last week, so we had tons of dirty clothes piled up. I am so thankful it's a super sized washer, though, because I was able to knock out 4 huge loads of laundry without any trouble. So nice. I've got another 4-5 to go, but most of the really important stuff got done last night. I'll work on the rest of it tonight. I'm thinking of doing a boiled dinner tonight with Keilbasa, potatoes, carrots and onions. It was a staple in our home when I was a kid and is very much a comfort food to me. It just sounds good, really. I might pick up another ring of Keilbasa, though, because I don't know that two rings will feed all of us, especially when feeding three growing teenagers. Food is a precious commodity in the household. Gads!

Kari spent the afternoon at the mall with a few of her friends. I was able to throw $30 her way so she'd have spending money. I have to say how impressed I am with her ability to make her money stretch. She was able to find 3 necklaces and three tops with the money I gave her. She showed me her favorite shirt, which I absolutely loved. It says "If you think I'm crazy, you should meet my Mother!" Ha! What a funny one, that girl is. I painted her fingernails and toenails last night while Kent and I watched the Red Wings game (woot! go wings!!). I am glad we get to do little things like that.

Josh has joined his church's softball league, which I am happy about. It will give him some good constructive activity to participate in with fairly decent people. We've been having a real struggle with him lying a lot lately, and not even about big things. It's little meaningless things too and I just don't know how to deal with it in a way that is going to make a big enough impact without turning him into a angry teenager. I mean, he's a good kid, and I feel like this habit stems from him trying to make people like him better...as if he exaggerates things or fibs about little things then he'll somehow seem like a better person?? I don't know how to explain it, but I thought I might talk to the pastor of his church and see if he would talk with him about it. I don't want him to ignore what his Dad and I say about it thinking that we are just picking on him. I want him to understand how much that kind of thing makes more trouble for him in the long run.

Well, I've rambled on quite enough.